Dryden's BEST Hotel? Holiday Inn Express Review (You Won't Believe This!)
Alright, buckle up buttercups, because we're diving headfirst into a review of [Hotel Name]! Prepare for a wild ride – not some dry, corporate BS, but the real deal, warts and all, from a tired traveler who's just seen it all, smelled it all, and maybe, just maybe, needs a strong coffee.
First Impressions & Getting In (aka The Accessibility Gauntlet):
Let me tell you – being truly accessible is a goddamn selling point. Does [Hotel Name] nail it? Well… let's break it down, shall we?
Wheelchair Accessible: YES?! (Hopefully, I'm not writing this review with a broken ankle. Let's keep our fingers crossed!), and also the Elevator must-have!
Facilities for Disabled Guests: This is crucial because the devil is in the details. Ramp access? Wide doorways? Grab bars in the bathrooms? Check, Check, Check (hopefully!).
Check-in/out [Express]: Gotta love a speedy check-in when you’re dragging luggage like a pack mule after a long flight.
Check-in/out [Private]: Maybe you want a private room for a special moment.
Doorman: A warm welcome is a plus.
Getting Around: Airport transfer, Car park and Taxi service.
Other Considerations:
- Exterior corridor: A bit noisy, not ideal.
- Hotel chain: Not the best and not the worst.
The Safety Dance – Are We Safe & Sound?
Look, in today's world, safety isn't just a bonus, it's a must. I want to feel like I'm not dodging invisible boogeymen every time I leave my room. So, how does [Hotel Name] fare on the fear-o-meter?
- CCTV in common areas & outside: Good, but not creepy good.
- Fire extinguisher, Smoke alarms, and Smoke detector: Essential.
- Front desk [24-hour]: Peace of mind, especially when you're battling jet lag at 3 AM.
- Safety/security feature: I need details.
- Security [24-hour]: Always a plus.
- Safe deposit boxes: Very important to leave your valuables.
The Cleanliness Crusade (The Germophobe's Guide):
Okay, let's get real. Cleanliness is next to godliness, especially in a post-pandemic world. I'm a bit of a neat freak (don't judge), so I'm paying close attention.
- Anti-viral cleaning products: This makes your bed feel safe.
- Daily disinfection in common areas
- Hand sanitizer: Check. Important to include.
- Hygiene certification: Good.
- Professional-grade sanitizing services: Even better.
- Rooms sanitized between stays: Excellent.
- Sanitized kitchen and tableware items: Crucial.
- Staff trained in safety protocol: The key for safety.
- Sterilizing equipment: This means they take it seriously.
The Room: My Little Sanctuary (or, hopefully, not a dungeon)
This is where I spend a good chunk of my time, so it needs to be well-equipped and actually livable.
- Available in all rooms: Additional toilet, Air conditioning, Alarm clock, Bathrobes, Bathroom phone, Bathtub, Blackout curtains, Carpeting, Closet, Coffee/tea maker, Complimentary tea, Daily housekeeping, Desk, Extra long bed, Free bottled water, Hair dryer, High floor, In-room safe box, Interconnecting room(s) available, Internet access – LAN, Internet access – wireless, Ironing facilities, Laptop workspace, Linens, Mini bar, Mirror, Non-smoking, On-demand movies, Private bathroom, Reading light, Refrigerator, Safety/security feature, Satellite/cable channels, Scale, Seating area, Separate shower/bathtub, Shower, Slippers, Smoke detector, Socket near the bed, Sofa, Soundproofing, Telephone, Toiletries, Towels, Umbrella, Visual alarm, Wake-up service, Wi-Fi [free], Window that opens.
The Food & Drink Frenzy (Because, Duh!)
Let's talk about the good stuff. The sustenance. The fuel for my travel adventures. Bonus points if it's good enough to write home about.
- Restaurants: Number and quality is key.
- Coffee shop: Needed for a caffeine junkie.
- Bar, Poolside bar: For a few drinks.
- Room service [24-hour]: Important to get.
- Breakfast [buffet]: Always a solid choice.
- Alternative meal arrangement, Asian breakfast, Asian cuisine in restaurant, Breakfast service, Buffet in restaurant, Coffee/tea in restaurant, Desserts in restaurant, International cuisine in restaurant, Salad in restaurant, Snack bar, Soup in restaurant, Vegetarian restaurant, Western breakfast, Western cuisine in restaurant: This is a rich selection options!
- Bottle of water: Should be free!
- Happy hour: Nice to have.
Pampering & Playtime (Because Vacation!)
Relaxation. That's the name of the game, right? Let's see if they've got the goods.
- Fitness center, Gym/fitness: Must have.
- Pool with view, Swimming pool, Swimming pool [outdoor]: Depends on your preferences.
- Spa, Spa/sauna: Excellent.
- Massage: Always.
- Sauna, Steamroom: Very good if you enjoy them.
- Body scrub, Body wrap, Foot bath: Depends on your preferences.
The Extras: Services & Conveniences (The Little Things That Make a Difference)
These are the details that elevate a hotel from "meh" to "HELL YES, I'M COMING BACK!"
- Air conditioning in public area, Audio-visual equipment for special events, Business facilities, Cash withdrawal, Concierge, Contactless check-in/out, Convenience store, Currency exchange, Daily housekeeping, Doorman, Dry cleaning, Elevator, Essential condiments, Food delivery, Gift/souvenir shop, Indoor venue for special events, Invoice provided, Ironing service, Laundry service, Luggage storage, Meeting/banquet facilities, Meetings, Meeting stationery, On-site event hosting, Outdoor venue for special events, Projector/LED display, Safety deposit boxes, Seminars, Shrine, Smoking area, Terrace, Wi-Fi for special events, Xerox/fax in business center: This is a lot, and a wide range.
For the Kids (Because, well, sometimes kids happen):
- Babysitting service, Family/child friendly, Kids facilities, Kids meal: Great options.
Digging into Internet Land (Because I Can't Live Without It):
Let's be honest, if the Wi-Fi sucks, I'm cranky. I need to be able to stream my cat videos and actually do some work (sometimes).
- Internet, Internet [LAN], Internet services, Wi-Fi in public areas, Free Wi-Fi in all rooms!: This is really important, and is an immediate check-mark.
The Verdict (My Honest, Messy Opinion):
Okay, so [Hotel Name]… it’s a mixed bag. The accessibility is a HUGE win for me (and a huge win for anyone with mobility issues!), the safety protocols seem solid, and the food options are pretty tempting. The rooms… well, that depends. Hopefully, it's a winner.
So, should YOU book a stay at [Hotel Name]?
Here's the deal:
- If accessibility is non-negotiable, BOOK IT.
- If you're a foodie looking for diverse dining options, BOOK IT.
- If you prioritize cleanliness and safety, BOOK IT.
- If you need solid Wi-Fi, BOOK IT.
BUT… (There's always a but, isn't there?)
- **If you're super sensitive to noise, check what the rooms are near.
- If it doesn't meet all of your needs, check other places.
FINAL, UNFILTERED THOUGHT:
[Hotel Name] seems to be a solid choice, especially if you value accessibility and decent food. Just be prepared to do your own homework to ensure it aligns with your specific needs and preferences.
My Persuasive (and Honest) Offer to You:
Okay, you’ve read my rambling, slightly disorganized, but hopefully helpful review. So, you're on the fence, right? Here's my pitch:
Book your stay at [Hotel Name] and prepare for a [mention a key benefit – e.g., worry-free experience, culinary adventure, relaxing escape]!
Here's Why (aka, My Emotional Pitch):
- Because you deserve to feel safe and taken care of.
- Because life is too short for bland food and terrible Wi-Fi.
- Because you deserve a damn vacation!
Alright, buckle up, buttercups, because you're about to embark on a digital journey to… Dryden, Ontario. Yeah, I know, the excitement is palpable. But hey, a good adventure isn't always about the Eiffel Tower, sometimes it's about finding the best breakfast buffet in a Holiday Inn Express, and trust me, I'm on a quest.
Holiday Inn Express Dryden - My Dryden Diary (aka a Mostly Honest Account)
Day 1: Arrival & the Great WiFi Fiasco (and a tiny victory!)
- 1:00 PM - ARRIVAL: Pulled up to the hallowed halls of the Holiday Inn Express. The sign? Bright. The lobby? Surprisingly, not depressing. It's clean. I mentally high-five myself for booking the "Premium King" (more on that later).
- 1:15 PM - Check-In Shenanigans: The front desk guy (Chad? Brad? Something ending in "-ad") was perfectly polite. Efficient, even. No drama, which is a win in my book. Key card in hand, I strutted towards the promised land… Room 317. I bet it's not where I was expecting to be.
- 1:30 PM - The WiFi War: Okay, so the advertised "free and high-speed WiFi" was a blatant lie. "Low-speed, and occasionally alive if you hold your phone just right" would be a more accurate description. I spent a good 20 minutes by the window, muttering incantations and refreshing my email. Eventually, it buckled. VICTORY! Small, but sweet. I sent a grumpy email to my boss. I am bad at my work.
- 2:00 PM - Room Inspection & Kingly Delusions: The room itself? Cleanish. The bed? BIG. "King" does not lie. The view? The parking lot. But hey, at least I didn't have a view of the dumpster. So, again, a win! I have a suspicion something like this will be in my mind a lot.
- 2:30 PM - The Great Snack Hunt: My stomach growled. Dryden. Not exactly a culinary mecca. The hotel vending machine? A wasteland of stale chips and questionable chocolate. I considered venturing into the wilds of Dryden for sustenance, but the WiFi situation had me tethered. I decided to suffer and eat the chips.
- 3:00 PM - "Working": I did try to actually do work. But I quickly got distracted by the fact that I couldn't actually work.
- 6:00 PM - Dinner Disaster (or, the Search for Decent Pizza): Google Maps directed me to the local pizza joint, "Pizza Palace." "Palace" might be a slight exaggeration. Let's just say, the carpet was older than my grandma. The pizza itself? Well, let's just say it tasted like pizza. Ate the whole thing. I am not proud.
- 8:00 PM - Evening Entertainment (Netflix & Regret): Back in the room. Netflix. Regret. Rinse and repeat. It's a cycle. I watched a bad movie. I am not even gonna remember it.
- 9:00 PM - Early Night: I am tired. Good night.
Day 2: Breakfast Bonanza & the Unexpected Joy of Small-Town Exploration
- 7:00 AM - BREAKFAST: THE MAIN EVENT: Time for the buffet! This is what it's all about. I walked into the breakfast area, which was buzzing with the energy of a small town. The usual players were all there, the weary businessman, me, and what felt like an entire hockey team. I surveyed the bounty: Scrambled eggs (questionable origin), sausage (likely from a can), waffles (potential). But then… THE TOAST! Perfectly toasted bread. It was a moment. I ate three slices. My day peaked early.
- 8:00 AM - The "Free" Coffee Revelation: I took my coffee to the small space. It was alright.
- 9:00 AM - Dryden Exploration (or, Why I love small towns now): I actually decided to venture out. Armed with my semi-working phone and a vague sense of curiosity, I started walking. First, the town hall! Then, I saw a lake. I just sat by it. It was quiet. The air smelled of pine and… peace? Maybe I miss the bigger city more than I thought.
- 12:00 PM - Lunch (Still Seeking Culinary Redemption): Back to the hotel. I got a sandwich from the vending machine. It was so bad, that I didn't even finish it.
- 1:00 PM - The "Premium King" Conundrum: I swear I'm in a comfy bed. I slept. This is a great hotel for the price.
- 4:00 PM - Back to work, or trying to: I didn't get much done.
- 6:00 PM - Dinner (Redemption Achieved!): I found a local restaurant. The food? Surprisingly fantastic. The service? Even better. I'm not telling you where it is.
- 8:00 PM - The Hotel Pool (and my existential crisis): There's a tiny indoor pool at the hotel. I considered it. I walked to the pool. Then, I walked away.
Day 3: Departure & the Dryden Afterglow
- 7:00 AM - Breakfast: The Farewell Feast: I said goodbye to the buffet. I overate. I don't regret it.
- 8:00 AM - Checkout Chaos (and a lingering WiFi curse): The checkout was uneventful. My WiFi worked… for a brief moment. Then, gone.
- 9:00 AM - Goodbye Dryden: Sayonara!
Final Thoughts:
Okay, so Dryden wasn't exactly a mind-blowing experience. But you know what? It was good. The Holiday Inn Express was fine. The breakfast was a highlight. The King bed was a blessing. And the pizza…well, it was memorable. I'm glad I came. I'm also glad I'm leaving. But I might miss the simplicity. Maybe. Alright, next adventure? Bring it on!
Unbelievable Serbia Getaway: Hotel Etno Centar Balasevic Awaits!
Okay, so... What exactly *is* this FAQ about, anyway? Because I'm already confused.
Haha! Good question! Honestly, I'm not 100% sure *what* I've gotten myself into. Let's call it... *a collection of things I've learned, survived, and probably screwed up* related to, well, *life*. Expect the unexpected, and prepare for a rollercoaster. Think “Dear Abby, but with even less advice and considerably more sarcasm.” Seriously, I could win a medal for the most useless advice giver, right next to my neighbor, Brenda, who thinks microwave popcorn is a gourmet meal. (Brenda, if you're reading this, I love you, but the burnt scent… it lingers.)
Is this going to be boring? Because I have the attention span of a goldfish on Red Bull.
Boring? Honey, no promises. I'm winging it here. I *am* known to ramble, and I get easily distracted by shiny objects, existential dread, and the sudden urge to reorganize my sock drawer (which, let's be honest, is probably the most exciting thing happening in my life right now). Look, if you need structure, maybe go read a manual. If you want a slightly unhinged human shouting into the internet void, then you've come to the right place. So, maybe it's boring, maybe it's brilliant! Who knows? Let's find out together.
Alright, alright, I'm intrigued. But what about...relationships? Got any wisdom there, oh wise one?
Relationships, eh? Ah, yes. The land of joy, pain, and questionable decisions. My wisdom? Oh, it’s abundant, trust me. First off, don’t listen to me. I'm in a constant state of “figuring it out,” just like everyone else. My *best advice*? Learn to love yourself first. Sounds cliché, I know, but it’s the damn truth! Trying to extract happiness and validation *from* a partner is like trying to get blood from a stone. You end up looking like a vampire with an empty glass. I tried that. Boy, did I try that! And look where it got me? (Okay, don’t look. It's a long story involving a broken heart, a questionable haircut, and a penchant for eating ice cream straight from the carton.) But seriously… be kind to yourself. The rest will follow. Maybe. Hopefully.
Okay, but what about... money? Because I'm pretty sure my bank account is a black hole.
Money? Ugh. The bane of my existence. I'm *terrible* with it, and I'm not afraid to admit it. I once spent an entire paycheck on… well, let’s just say it involved a sparkly sequined jacket and a very enthusiastic karaoke session. Zero regrets, though! (Okay, maybe one tiny regret about the resulting ramen-only diet.) Seriously though: I suck at budgeting. Avoid my financial habits. I'm convinced my bank account is haunted by gremlins who sneak in at night and steal my life savings for beer and potato chips. I'm working on it! Slowly. Very slowly. One tiny baby step at a time. My advice, and it's not great… Try not to spend it all at once. And maybe, just maybe, actually look at your bank statement.
So, what about… hobbies? Do you, like, *do* anything besides contemplate the meaning of life (and your bank statement)?
Hobbies? Ha! You'd think I would, wouldn't you? Okay, I *try*. I'm passionate about... well, I *was* passionate about knitting. I made a scarf. It took three months. It’s now approximately… a foot long, and I lost interest, so it ended up in a pile of discarded yarn, somewhere. I dabble in writing, but mostly, I'm just procrastinating. I love to read, but I have to be careful because I can easily get lost in a book. If I'm not careful, I will forget to eat and or shower for days. I'm a champion napper, and I'm trying to be passionate about self-care, but I usually end up watching TV. That said, my hobbies are a work in progress, like me. So, if you see me walking around with a half-finished knitting project or covered in yarn… don't judge.
My best hobby advice is to *try* something. It doesn’t have to be perfect and it doesn't have to be amazing. Just... do something.
I'm a bit lost. What's the take away from all of this?
The takeaway? Oh, good question!
1. **Embrace the Mess:** Life is messy. Own it.
2. **Be Kind to Yourself (Seriously):** You're doing your best. And that's enough (mostly).
3. **Don't Take My Advice Too Seriously:** I'm just a person, stumbling through the darkness, like everyone else.
And finally, enjoy the ride, even when it sucks. Because eventually, it will get better. Or at least different. And who knows? Maybe that's good enough.
Are you going to keep updating this?
Probably not. Just kidding! Maybe. I'll try! Depending on if I remember to or if the desire takes hold. And that's the truth. Consider this a work in progress, a chaotic, constantly evolving testament to the beautiful, baffling, and occasionally exhausting experience of being a human. I might add to it. I might forget it. Maybe, I will change my entire personality to match this thing! It depends. Just keep checking back. Or don't. Either way, love you.
