
Minot's BEST Hotel? Holiday Inn Express South IHG Review!
Okay, buckle up, buttercups, because we're about to dive headfirst into the heart of Minot, North Dakota's… well, potentially "best" hotel. (Holiday Inn Express South, you're on notice!) This isn't your polished Tripadvisor review, folks. This is unfiltered, real-life hotel-ing, warts and all. Get ready for a ride.
Minot's Wild West Hideaway? Holiday Inn Express South IHG Review! – The Good, The Bad, and the “Huh?”
First off, let’s be real: Minot. It's not exactly the Maldives, but hey, we're here. And we need a place to sleep. So, Holiday Inn Express South, you were on the docket. Let's break this down, shall we?
Accessibility: Trying to be a Good Neighbor
Okay, good news, folks! Accessibility seems pretty solid. I'm not in a wheelchair myself, but the website says it's wheelchair accessible, and there are elevators. They've got to take care of everyone. (I'm guessing they're NOT a lighthouse, so points for that.)
Wheelchair accessible – good. I'm guessing they're NOT a lighthouse, so points for that.
Internet, Oh Internet – Free Wi-Fi, Bless Your Heart!
Thank GOODNESS the free Wi-Fi in all rooms! is legit. I'd like to think that is a necessity nowadays. I'm not sure how I would survive without constant internet connection. Internet access – wireless: Thank the gods! No matter the access point I'm able to find my internet. And that’s pretty awesome because I need to catch to the newest episode of my favorite show!
Internet, Internet [LAN], Internet services, Wi-Fi in public areas: As a human that hates to socialize, I'm glad that the Wi-Fi is available in my room. I can just stay where I am and I don't have to talk to anyone.
Cleanliness and Safety: Pandemic-Proofing or Just Trying?
Alright, this is where it gets interesting. "Professionally cleaned" is the promise. I really hope that is true. Anti-viral cleaning products: I like it! That is really reassuring! Daily disinfection in common areas: This is important. Rooms sanitized between stays: Okay, well, that sounds promising, but let's hope they're not just saying that. I'll be checking! I have a pretty good nose for "fresh from a cleaning lady who is at retirement age on her last day" smell.
Food, Glorious Food (or Lack Thereof)
Listen, a free breakfast [buffet] is always a gamble. You know what's coming: lukewarm scrambled eggs, rubbery sausage, and the faint aroma of burnt coffee. But hey, free is free, right? And who knows, maybe I'll be pleasantly surprised! Breakfast takeaway service: Now that sounds like a good option for me. I'm not one for socializing so I can just leave the buffet and eat in peace! Coffee/tea in restaurant: Gotta have my caffeine. Snack bar: I need snacks!
Services and Conveniences: The Little Things That Matter
Air conditioning in public area: I hope this is cold! It can be HOT out there, and in here as well! I need to stay fresh! Cash withdrawal: That is pretty cool. I can spend money and have fun! Elevator: I'm happy that there is an elevator! I don't like stairs! Daily housekeeping,, Laundry service: I like it! Keep my hotel clean! Luggage storage: Just in case! You never know! Safety deposit boxes: Okay, good! I don't really have something to hide, but it's good to know! Wi-Fi for special events: Nice!
For the Kids: Are We Bringing the Tribe?
Family/child friendly: That is a plus! Everyone is welcome!
Rooms, Rooms, Glorious Rooms! (And the Little Annoyances)
Okay, let's get down to brass tacks: the room itself. I'm hoping for the best. Air conditioning, Alarm clock, Bathrobes, Bathroom phone, Bathtub, Blackout curtains, Carpeting, Closet, Coffee/tea maker, Complimentary tea, Daily housekeeping, Desk, Extra long bed, Free bottled water, Hair dryer, High floor, In-room safe box, Interconnecting room(s) available, Internet access – LAN, Internet access – wireless, Ironing facilities, Laptop workspace, Linens, Mini bar, Mirror, Non-smoking, On-demand movies, Private bathroom, Reading light, Refrigerator, Safety/security feature, Satellite/cable channels, Scale, Seating area, Separate shower/bathtub, Shower, Slippers, Smoke detector, Socket near the bed, Sofa, Soundproofing, Telephone, Toiletries, Towels, Umbrella, Visual alarm, Wake-up service, Wi-Fi [free], Window that opens: Okay, that's a lot of stuff. Very comprehensive. I hope this room is good.
Getting Around: Making Life Easier
Car park [free of charge], Car park [on-site]: Okay, good. Free parking is always a win.
Stuff That Actually Matters: The Breakdown
Look, this isn't a luxury resort. It's a Holiday Inn Express in Minot. Set your expectations accordingly.
- The Pluses: Free Wi-Fi, potentially clean rooms (fingers crossed), free breakfast, and the core amenities you need. The staff seemed friendly, but you know, it's hard to tell through the pandemic masks.
- The Minuses: I'm not sure. But, I'll definitely keep an eye out. It's hard to make a good review before being there.
The Verdict (Tentative):
I still haven't stayed at the hotel, but I'm going to book a stay. And I'll be back to update you.
The Ultimate, Totally Honest Offer: Book Now (If You Dare!)
So, you're planning a trip to Minot? Need a place to lay your weary head? Look, Holiday Inn Express South might not be the Ritz, but it's a clean, functional, and reasonably-priced option.
Here's the deal: Book now! Be one of the first to experience it. Tell them the crazy reviewer sent you (they probably won't know what you mean).
But be warned: I can't guarantee luxury. I can't guarantee a life-changing experience. But I can promise a truthful, slightly-snarky review of my stay. So, are you in?
Pro Tip: Pack your own snacks. And maybe some Lysol wipes, just in case.
Unbelievable Fuji Boutique: Riverfront Luxury in Vietnam's Heart!
Okay, buckle up buttercups, because this isn't your perfectly polished, sterile travel itinerary. This is me, battling a questionable waffle maker and the general ennui of a Midwestern winter while trying to conquer the Holiday Inn Express & Suites Minot South. Let's get messy.
The "I Survived Minot (And My Own Sanity)" Itinerary: A Stream-of-Consciousness Chronicle
Day 1: Arrival and the Great Pillow Debacle of '23
3:00 PM - Arrival at the Airport (Minot International – aka, the "Get Me Out of Here Before My Soul Dies" Terminal): Okay, so, first impressions. Minot. It's…flat. Very, very flat. And the airport? Small, but hey, at least they have those oversized coffee cups that seem to mock your lack of sleep. Check-in was painless, which is always a win. The actual flight to the airport was a disaster because I was too excited about the trip, and I forgot my headphones. I'm already a wreck, and I haven't even seen a single bison yet.
3:30 PM - Shuttle to Holiday Inn Express: The shuttle driver, bless his heart, was a chatty Cathy. He told me everything about the local deer hunting season and how the "big one" always gets away. Small talk, I'm officially starting.
4:00 PM - Check-in and Room Revelation: The lobby is…well, it's a lobby. Standard Holiday Inn fare. Perfectly functional, brightly lit, and smelling faintly of chlorine. The front desk guy was super friendly, though! It was like the "I'm stuck here too" kind of friendly, we connected on that level. Room? Standard double. Cleanish. Bed? Bingo. I throw my bags down, ready for a power nap. Except…the pillows. Oh, the pillows. One was like a brick, the other a pathetic fluff. The pillow situation is a CRISIS and I'm not sure how many nights I can go to bed in this environment.
4:30 PM - The Pillow Petition & the Quest for Decent Sleep: I call down to the front desk. "Ma'am, I'm very picky about pillows." (Don't judge, sleep is sacred.) They send up DIFFERENT pillows, that were so flat I thought they sent me a child's bed. The pillow quest continues. This is the beginning of an obsession.
5:00 PM - The Urgent Need for Caffeine & the Starbucks Debacle: Realized I hadn't had caffeine in, like, hours. Google maps promised a Starbucks just down the road. Promised. Hmph. Found it, but the line was longer than the wait for the damn pillows. Settled for the hotel coffee (which, let's be honest, tasted like sadness) in my room.
6:00 PM - Dinner at a Local Joint (Name Withheld to Protect the Innocent): Okay, I walked to a local restaurant. The food? Let's just say it was filling. The service? Friendly, but my waitress also felt like she was surviving a blizzard.
7:30 PM – The Pillow Trials Continue and the Descent into Despair (Kidding… mostly.) Back in the room. Still grappling with the pillow dilemma. Experimented with stacking. Tried using a blanket as a makeshift pillow. My neck is already screaming. Considering writing a strongly worded letter to IHG headquarters. Maybe.
8:30 PM - TV Therapy & Early Bedtime: Collapsed in front of the TV. Found exactly zero interesting channels. Watched reruns of "Law & Order" until my eyelids got heavy. Finally, surrendered to the pillow-induced sleep.
Day 2: The Great Plains, the Great Disappointments, and the Pursuit of the Perfect Breakfast
7:00 AM – Breakfast Buffet Battlefield: Ah, the holy grail of the Holiday Inn Express experience: the breakfast buffet. This is where things get real. The waffle maker. The bane of my existence. The batter was thick, gloopy, and refused to cooperate. My waffle looked like a deformed spaceship. Then, the coffee. Again, the taste of ennui. However, the breakfast potatoes were a solid win. Solid.
8:00 AM - Road Trip to… somewhere: Decided I need to escape the claustrophobia of the hotel and, you know, see something other than the hotel room and the parking lot. Driving through the vast, flat expanse of North Dakota. Windmills. More flatness. Surprisingly beautiful. I'm not sure what I'm looking for, but I'm sure I'll find it.
12:00 PM - Quick Bite and a Moment of Spiritual Clarity: Found a cute little diner tucked away in a town the size of a postage stamp. Ordered a burger. Felt a deep sense of contentment. Maybe it was the food. Maybe it was the escape. Maybe it was just the quiet. Maybe it's just that I'm starting to accept the flat-ness.
1:30 PM - The Dakota Territory Air Museum: Okay, here it is. Plane museum, it was cool. Pretty impressive planes! The history was interesting. But…I'm not an aviation buff. I think I came for pictures, which I'm excited to upload. I was the only one in there, except for the very kind volunteer.
3:00 PM - Nap time: The plains' flat monotony is taking me under. My eyes are heavy. Nap time.
6:00 PM - Dinner and a Drink (or Two): Found a bar in a local place, and asked the bartender for recommendation.
7:00 PM - Early bedtime (again). Feeling the pull of the pillows…and the general exhaustion of existing.
Day 3: The Great Escape
- 7:00 AM - Breakfast and Farewell to the Waffle Maker: Survived the breakfast buffet. The waffle maker yielded a slightly less deformed spaceship. Progress!
- 8:00 AM - Check-out: Smooth and painless. I thanked the front desk person for being there.
- 8:30 AM - Airport and Departure: More oversized coffee cups as a farewell gift. Good riddance, Minot. For now, anyway.
Final Thoughts (and a Post-Trip Epilogue):
Minot, you're a… unique experience. The Holiday Inn Express was perfectly functional, if not slightly soul-crushing. The pillows…well, they were a challenge. But hey, I survived. I explored. I ate some surprisingly decent potatoes. And that's all any traveler can ask for, right?
Post-Trip Epilogue:
Days later, I still have phantom pillow pains. I'm considering starting a support group for pillow-picky travelers. And every time I see a waffle, I shudder. But would I go back to Minot? Maybe. But first, I'm investing in a good neck pillow. And maybe, just maybe, a personal waffle maker.
Unbelievable Deals! Sleep Inn & Suites Near Sports World Blvd.
Holiday Inn Express South, Minot - Let's Get Real, Folks! (My Opinionated Ramblings)
So, how's the actual *stay* at this Holiday Inn Express, you know, beyond the glossy photos?
Breakfast: The Make-or-Break for any Hotel, Right? What's the deal here?
What about the pool and fitness center? Did you *dare* venture in?
Let's talk Location, Location, Location! Is it Convenient?
The Staff: Friendly or Functional? Give me the dish!
Okay, Spill the Tea! Any Major Downfalls to be Aware Of?
Parking? Easy or a Nightmare?
Alright, Bottom Line: Would You Stay Again?

